No Fun if the Keys are There
by The Cocky Undead
Summary: Ryan agrees to show Seth how to break into a car. Set early in season one.


**[No fun if the Keys are There]**

"Okay. So." Ryan said looking over the hood of the car to his foster brother. "You sure you wanna do this?"

"Oh, yeah. I'm sure. Do you have any idea how long I've waited for something like this? Years, Ryan, years."

"Uh-huh." Ryan shook his head. "If this is gonna happen and we get caught—."

"It's my fault. Yeah, yeah, I know this, Ryan." Seth waved a hand dismissively.

"Good." Ryan said, glad that they were on the same page for once. He moved around the car to stand next to Seth, who stood in front of the driver's side of the Land Rover.

Ryan dug his hand into his deep sweatshirt pocket, removing the few items that had been sitting in the bottom of his pocket. He gave the lock picks in his hand a bemused look, wondering how long they had been in there.

"Ooh!" Seth gasped as the dying light glinted on the lock picks. "Is that what we're going to use? Please tell me it is! Dude, do you know how many times I've seen this in the movies? Hundreds of times. Hundreds."

"Seth." Ryan said, cutting him off. His hand still gripped the tools.

"Yeah, man."

"Shut up."

"No problem."

Obviously, it's a little bit of a problem Ryan thought, rolling his eyes at the jittery teen who vibrated at a nerve racking speed at his elbow.

"I'm not actually gonna use these…they've been in my pockets for a while, I guess."

"Ah, maaan."

Ryan ignored Seth's disappointment. He crouched down next to his duffel and was soon joined by Seth.

Ryan zipped open his green bag, shoving his lock picks into it. He then began to riffle through the bag.

"Hey, Ryan?" Seth asked after a moment of holding his breath. "What are you looking for exactly?"

"A Slim Jim." Ryan said shortly, not looking up.

"Like, beef jerky?"

Ryan stopped, "What? No."

"Oh."

"A Slim Jim is…" Ryan paused as his fingers felt the cool metal strip. "…this." He pulled it out of the bag with a flourish.

"…Wow, Ryan, that's really great." Seth didn't bother to keep the disappointment out of his voice. "It's a piece of metal."

Ryan rolled his eyes and got to his feet, followed closely by Seth. "This isn't just a piece of metal. This is the very item that landed me in juvie."

Seth's eyes grew big and he reached a hesitant hand out to probe the Slim Jim. "So…what did you do with it? Beat someone with it?"

"Seriously, Seth? Do you not remember…jeez, man. I stole a car, remember? This," Ryan waved it under Seth's nose, "Is what Trey used to break into the car."

"Aaah, that makes so much more sense." Seth said.

Ryan shook his head and turned to the car window. He glanced over his shoulder at Seth. "Are you sure about this?"

"Yeah, buddy. I already told you. I will take full responsibly for this one. I wanna learn how to do this stuff. Now that we're brothers, I have to learn some of your talents just like you learned some of mine."

Ryan squinted at Seth in some confusion, not sure what talents Seth had taught him over the course of the past few weeks. He shrugged, and turned back to the matter at hand.

"Alright." Ryan said. He carefully placed the Slim Jim next to the window and eased it down into the car door. He ignored Seth for a moment, concentrating on getting the car door open.

Seth held his breath next to Ryan and watched with excitement as Ryan glared at the metal strip in his hands.

Seth vaguely wondered if that was part of the trick; glare at the car door till it gave up and opened out of fear. But that, obviously, didn't make any sense…cars weren't real. Well, cars were real, but they didn't feel things because they weren't human…unless Terminators had already started their infiltration of the world a few years early.

An audible pop, broke Seth's train of, admittedly strange thoughts.

"There she is." Ryan said turning back around to face Seth, a grin etched in his features. Seth took a moment to appreciate how genuine the smile was, deciding to ignore the fact that the smile had come about by breaking into his mom's car.

Ryan reached forward and gripped the door handle. He opened the door and leaned forward into the car for a moment, before popping back out.

"Now what?" He asked, leaning his back against the leather seat.

"Now?" Seth asked coming forward, crowding Ryan farther into the car. "Now we start this puppy up and take her for a joy ride."

"Wait—what?" Ryan protested shoving Seth back so that he had a little more space. "Dude, no. You just asked me to show you how to open the locked car door. You never said that we were going to hotwire the car and take a ride."

"You know how to hotwire too?" Seth practically squealed. "I was only slightly kidding when I suggested we take her for a ride, but this new bit of information changes everything."

Ryan winced and lifted both hands up to his face, covering it.

"Ryan, Ryan." Seth put both hands on his friend's shoulders, "Do you know how powerful I feel right now?"

Ryan dropped his hands from his face and shot Seth one of his patented Ryan Atwood looks. "You didn't do anything."

"That may be true, but I'm the one calling the shots here." Seth said, "I'm your Lord and Master and I'm saying we go for a ride."

Ryan blinked at Seth.

"What do you say? One little, short ride. It'll be over before you know it. I'll even let you drive."

"No."

"Oh, come on, Ryan!" Seth protested as Ryan pushed Seth's hands off his shoulders. "Are you always such a stick in the mud?"

Ryan bent down and picked up his bag, "Yup."

Seth groaned theatrically into his hands. "We were having such a good time. We were having a moment there, Ryan. A moment."

Ryan slung his bag over his shoulder. "Oh, yeah?"

"Yeah. But the moments gone. All because you didn't want to hotwire a car."

Ryan raised his eyebrows at Seth. "You do realize that by not saying no was what got me in trouble in the first place."

"Yeah, but now you're here with us. So you come out on top in that situation, buddy."

Ryan cocked his head to the side and gave Seth another look.

Seth opened his mouth to retort, when a pair of headlights suddenly blinded both of them.

Seth brought a hand up, shielding his eyes. His mouth opened even wider as he realized who was sitting behind the wheel of the new car and who was in the passenger seat.

"Crap."

Sandy stuck his head out of his window, still a few feet away from the driveway. "What do you boys think you're doing?"

Seth and Ryan simultaneously turned toward each other.

"Run?" Ryan asked.

"Run." Seth agreed.

* * *

**A/N: So this is my first O.C. story (I just finished the series finale a week ago...I know, I know. I'm really late to this bandwagon) and I'm hoping that it won't be my last.  
Also, I have no idea how Slim Jims work or anything like that, so if this is super vague that's the reason. **


End file.
